The treatment was six courses, the first starting on 17/8/83 and the last was in November of that year. By the end of this time I was in remission and feeling better, but what a shock the preceding months had been! Everyone reacts differently to Chemotherapy, from those who almost take it in their stride, getting treatment in outpatients and going home to feel a bit sick overnight, through the moderate who get quite sick, to the extreme. Me. I got my first course of Chop on a Thursday and woke(?) up again on a Saturday. Very, very groggy. In between I had been oblivious to the goings on in the ward and missed the ward rounds. The only sign of life for two days was the urgent reach for a basin and the violent retching. Throughout all my treatment, I took chemo so badly, I was never able to take it as an outpatient, like many of my peers. I could not have made it home. Many times I had to call for a basin as the chemo was infused.

The next months became a rollercoaster of chemo, steroids, bursts of energy and fatigue. The steroids made me bloated, eating like a horse and energetic. Coming off steroids, I was drained. I spent many days lying on the sofa, I had no strength even to go to the front door. I became completely dependant. My son was only four, so thankfully was not aware of what was going on. My wife gained a strength she did not know she was capable of. She had to take complete responsibility for everything that had to be done, as well as travelling on two busses each day to visit me when I was in hospital. I no longer had the inclination to worry about bills or shopping. My wife had to take over looking after the family finances. I didn't have the concentration required to look after it. Anyway, I was no longer able to hold the pen to sign cheques. One of the side effects of the jungle juice. The feeling going in my finger tips. The pain in the joints. Treatment induced mood swings and no hair. Thankfully now all distant recollections, many of them only recalled when I talk to current patients.

I had a lot of pain during my chemo. Due to the growth in my chest, other organs became displaced. With the reduction in the tumour, these organs began to push back into place. Boy, did that hurt! After the third course of chop I felt like …, well you know what. I'd had three months of sickness, pain, loss of hair, loss of feeling and my taste buds weren't what they used to be. Then two young doctors called me into the office to show me the before and after x-rays. The large orange was now the size of a small golf ball. They were so happy for me. I'm afraid that I didn't share their enthusiasm. If it was working so well, why did I feel so bad!? We've all heard of doctors taking the Hippocratic oath. Well, here's what he said in about 400 BC. 'For extreme illnesses extreme remedies are most fitting'. They seem to swear by that one too.